Encouragement For Everyone · Encouragement For Singles

When I Am Afraid…

When I Am Afraid

I had a moment the other day in church.

Everything was going great until the kids, who were all practically resuming school the next day, were called out for prayers, as they go back to school. As I watched them come out to the front, I felt a lump in my throat, it felt like the lump grew bigger when some mothers also came out carrying their babies, I tried to dismiss how I was suddenly feeling and focus on praying for the kids but instead, like monkeys on a tree, swinging from branch to branch, different thoughts started swinging through my mind…

“When will I have my own kids, that will call me mummy not Auntie Sherie.”

“What if I never get married and never have kids?”

“Aww, look at sis … carrying her baby,  I wish that was me.”

With no time to recover at all, just as prayers for the kids rounded up, the pastor called out an intending couple. (Oh, come on!)

As the pastor talked about their upcoming wedding, more thoughts joined the others who were still swinging.

“When will it be my turn to be called out like this and my wedding announced?”

“How much longer?”

I’d like to tell you that in the midst of all that swinging, I immediately received a calming scripture or something like that, but no, I didn’t, I left church feeling rather upset.

                                                                    *******

The next day, as I went through some devotional materials, I came across ‘the calming scripture’, Psalms 56:3-4;

“But when I am afraid,  I will put my trust in You. I praise God for what He has promised. I trust in God, so why should I be afraid?”

I felt like God was saying to me, “about yesterday, don’t be afraid, just trust Me”.

Oh, how it encouraged and strengthened my heart.

So, I thought to share and encourage you with it too, for when you are afraid, wondering if, why, when and how, know that you are not alone and choose to trust God, to keep trusting Him.

When you get anxious and have all these cares for today, about tomorrow or even from yesterday, you don’t have to carry it, letting it weigh you down, God cares about you and He wants you to cast them on Him, trust Him enough and do just that. (1 Peter 5:7)

“Our God is good and He loves us. Even when we can’t see His hands, we can still trust His heart.”

Be encouraged.

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Encouragement For Singles

9 Bad Reasons To Get Married

Bad Reasons To Get Married Post

I know you (really) want to get married, you and me both girl, you and me both but for some reason it just hasn’t happened yet and it’s not like you can just go grab you a husband from a store or log in somewhere and order, expecting a delivery within 7 days, at least then, you’d have an answer for the when-questions.

Sometimes, all we can do, (usually after we’ve done everything else), is to trust God and wait on Him.

I also know that there are a lot of people who want you to get married, so much so, that it’s like they can’t wait for your waiting on God, they don’t get it, they keep giving you the you-should-be-married-by-now look. Perhaps, there are even times when you are tempted to go the lay-with-Hagar route, you know, take matters into your hands, just marry anybody already, can I get a witness?

I know there’s the pressure, the questions, the set ups from those in the there’s-this-guy-I-know department, the advices (mostly unsolicited), the expectations, the aunties ( I believe single ladies have more aunties than anyone else, don’t you agree?), the reminders- from social media and almost everywhere you turn, everyone but you seems paired up, it’s like Noah’s ark out there and it’s understandably, easy to feel left out and perhaps, want to get married at all costs, but making a decision (as important as who to marry) under that condition, can cost you.

No matter how much the pressure may be, always consider it too expensive, you can’t afford to get married for the wrong reasons.

Marriage is a blessing from God (as is singleness). To be married is good and desirable but these 9 reasons below are not great reasons to (want to) get married;

  • Everyone Else Is / All Your Friends Have

God has unique plans for each of our lives, no man’s life is the template for another and we all soon come to learn that there isn’t a one for all timetable for things to happen in our lives. Besides, scripture encourages us not to compare ourselves with others. Stop looking at the time it happened for someone else as an expiration date for it happening for you, because it. is. not.

  • You Feel You’re Running Out Of Time 

Well, not as long as you are walking with God. Remember Abraham? Girl, your Father, God, is in charge. It’s not over until He says so. Better to seem to be running out of time, than it not happening at the right time, as Lysa TerKeurst rightly says, “God loves us too much to answer our prayers at any other time than the right time”. Picture this, a fruit you really like, for example. Have you ever had it when it was unripe? I bet it’s sweeter, better and more enjoyable when it’s ripe, yea? Now, was it a fruit when it was unripe? Yes, but was it ready to be eaten? No, and what did it take for it to be ready? Time. See? Things are sweeter, better, and more enjoyable at the right time.  Trust God. All things are working together for your good.

  • You Think You’re Old Enough

Marriage requires maturity, old enough doesn’t necessarily mean grown enough, to thyself be true.

  • You Are Tired Of Being Single

Don’t do it because you are tired, do it because you are ready, and don’t just say you are ready because you are tired either.

Stop thinking you can only earn joy when you get to where you want to be, learn to enjoy where you are, where God has you.

  • You Think You May Not Get Another Chance

If you are unsettled about them, please don’t settle with them and trust me, as long as you are doing it God’s way, better’s never behind, but just ahead. “It’s better to be on the shelf than in the wrong cupboard.”

  • You Don’t Want To Be Left Out

Darling, you were secretly, uniquely, fearfully and wonderfully made. Your life doesn’t have to look like everyone else for to it be considered beautiful and successful, it doesn’t have to look like everyone else for it to be what God wants it to be and there’s nothing quite as beautiful and truly successful as being where God wants you be. You are not being left out, you are wanting their life when you should be living yours. No matter how wonderful you think someone else life is, your life isn’t any less wonderful.

  • To Prove A Point

Okay so, after you rush into a marriage you know is clearly wrong for you, just to prove that nothing is wrong with you, what happens?

  • To Get It Checked Off Your Life’s To-do List

If you are in a rush to get married, you could end up making a rash decision that could result in harsh consequences.

  • You’ re Done With School And That’s Naturally ‘Societal-ly’ The Next Thing To Do

Well, it doesn’t have to be like that. Don’t put yourself under unnecessary pressure, remember what we said about pressure earlier, it’s too expensive…

There, so let’s talk. Did any resonate, do you agree with 9 of them, what would you add (or not)? Please share your thoughts in the comments below, thank you.

I pray that God will help us to seek His will in all our ways and help us to trust Him to direct us, in Jesus’ name, amen.

Image credit: Pexels.com

 

 

Encouragement For Everyone · Encouragement For Singles · Everything Else

31 Random Thoughts As I Turn 31

30

Hi there,

Birthday girl here.

It’s my birthday and to celebrate here, I’m sharing some thoughts that’ll probably make you go hmmm, huh or perhaps, hahaha…

Here we go;

      1. God is good, His plans are better, He knows best. Trust Him.
      2. God’s going to do what He’s going to do, no one or thing can thwart His plans and purpose.
      3. You can totally trust God, He loves you and He’s got your best interest at heart.
      4. Yes, God loves you but He also wants you to grow up.
      5. You can’t have a godly relationship without having a relationship with God.
      6. Relationships don’t make you happy, happy people make happy relationships.
      7. “The one” is human just like you.
      8. You want to submit to a man who submits to God.
      9. God heals the brokenhearted. Yes, broken hearts heal, mine did.
      10. If life had a remote control, I bet singleness won’t be its pause button.
      11. You don’t have to have a life partner to enjoy your life, you just need to partner with “The Life”.
      12. It matters to make Jesus the heart of the matter in matters of the heart.
      13. Your mistakes do not define you, don’t let them confine you.
      14. To thyself be loving.
      15. Waiting on God is never a waste of time.
      16. It’s okay if your life looks different from other people, even if they are the same sex or the same age as you, know that no matter how wonderful someone’s life looks to you because of what they have that you don’t or what they are doing that you’re not, your life isn’t any less wonderful.
      17. You don’t have to have it all figured out, you couldn’t if you tried but what you can do and should do, is trust God, He has it all figured out.
      18. Rest but don’t quit.
      19. Cast, not carry. Cast your cares.
      20. Lose control to God.
      21. I’ll never understand people who argue with me that I’m not single. I say I’m single, you say I’m not, is it your single?
      22. Two things are hard for a girl; Letting shoes that don’t fit go and listening to herself when she can tell a guy doesn’t really like her.
      23. Final answer, not settling? Final answer, not settling.
      24. know your worth. You’re who God says you are, your worth is found in Him, not in their validation or your acquisitions.
      25. Sometimes, singleness feels like being stuck between looking at the time and looking at God. Not looking at God like looking onto Him for help and strength now, but looking at Him like, Lord, can you see the time sir?
      26. Don’t fret when anyone tells you “time is going”, the way I see it , you should rejoice and be glad because if time is going, that means it’s moving , not stuck and as it moves, it will get to your turn, so in actual sense, it just means your time is coming.
      27. Y’all, everyday of my life, I need Jesus and if I’m going to share my life with anyone, it has to be with someone who loves Jesus and will love me like Jesus.
      28. The God who sent His son, Jesus, to establish a relationship with you and save you from hell, won’t send you someone, who will put you through hell in a relationship, that’s how you’ll know.
      29. Hear ye me sis, “man no be man & no be just to marry o” – you can’t marry just anyone & you don’t just marry for the fun of it.
      30. “The most wonderful people don’t always marry first”? Oook, I think I’ve been wonderful enough, I’m done, can I marry now please?
      31. Life please don’t give me lemons, I don’t like lemonade. Got a man? I mean, mangoes, got some mangoes?

Thanks for reading, so which ones made you go hmmm or huh or hahaha?

PS: If you wanted an update on No.7 from the 29 things I shared about me here, this photo below says it all. 🙂  

NoNewsOnMyLoveLife

 

Encouragement For Everyone · Encouragement For Singles

#WIFE: If God Has A To-Do List…

ToDoList

If God has a to-do list, I believe working out His plans for my life, fulfilling His purpose for me, is on it.

“The Lord will work out his plans for my life- for your faithful love, O Lord, endures forever.” – Psalms 138:8a NLT

I believe He has it all figured out, so I’ll simply trust Him and not try to figure out everything on my own. (Proverbs 3:5 MSG)

I believe He will finish what He has started, it will go from to-do to done.

For He says, “I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you…” – Jeremiah 29:11 MSG

He also says, “timing is His business” (Acts 1:7 MSG), so I believe at the right time, it will be checked off.

Encouragement For Everyone · Encouragement For Singles

#WIFE: 5 Reminders For When You Get Weary Of Waiting

Encouragement on waiting (2)

Dear girl who’s waiting,

Do you know that the bible calls you BLESSED for waiting?

Blessed are all they that wait for Him. – Isaiah 30:18b

If you are blessed for waiting, how much more when you receive what you are waiting for?

No question about it, waiting can be hard but you know what’s harder? Wishing you waited.

Waiting on God can feel more like a journey through the desert than a  walk in the park, but stick with God and you’ll get the promise.

As hard as it can be, it’s still the way to go and know this sweet girl, you are not alone, God’s got you and He’s got some of us waiting too, just like you.

In those times, when it’s downright hard, when you feel like you can’t keep on waiting, you know, the Lord-how-much-longer times, may these reminders encourage you to hold on;

  • It is good to wait on God.

“It is good that one should hope in and wait quietly for the salvation (the safety and ease) of the Lord.” – Lamentations 3:26

  • You are not wasting time, God is working.

“For from of old no one has heard nor perceived by the ear, nor has the eye seen a God besides You, Who works and shows Himself active on behalf of him who [earnestly] waits for Him.” – Isaiah 64:4

  • You won’t regret waiting on the Lord.

“for they shall not be put to shame who wait for, look for, hope for, and expect Me.” – Isaiah 49:23b

  • God’s grace is available and sufficient.

But He said to me, My grace (My favor and loving-kindness and mercy) is enough for you [sufficient against any danger and enables you to bear the trouble manfully]; for My strength and power are made perfect (fulfilled and completed) and show themselves most effective in [your] weakness.” – 2 Corinthians 12:9

  • God will settle you, don’t settle.

“And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace [Who imparts all blessing and favor], Who has called you to His [own] eternal glory in Christ Jesus, will Himself complete and make you what you ought to be, establish and ground you securely, and strengthen, and settle you.” – 1 Peter 5:10

Be encouraged and if you want to talk, just buzz me here, perhaps we could meet and hug it out.

Encouragement For Singles

His Leaving Shouldn’t Stop Your Living

HeartBroken

Dear brokenhearted girl,

I know it hurts, no doubt, but I also know it can heal.

God heals, He restores.

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds [curing their pains and their sorrows]. – Psalms 147:3

The relationship ended not your life.

You will be fine, soon you’ll be yourself again.

Please don’t see this like it’s gotten the best of you, see it like it’s for the best.

It’s okay to ‘mourn’ but like God asked Samuel in 1 Samuel 16:1, for how long, girl?

The Lord said to Samuel, How long will you mourn for Saul, seeing I have rejected him from reigning over Israel? Fill your horn with oil; I will send you to Jesse the Bethlehemite. For I have provided for Myself a king among his sons. – 1 Samuel 16:1

Maybe it’s time for you to ‘fill your horn with oil and get going’, you know, get on with business, get back to living?

Maybe it’s time, girl.

His leaving shouldn’t stop your living.

He was just a part of your story, not the whole of it nor the end of it.

Time to turn the page.

Be encouraged.